It's MY Body Anyway

I have had an interesting journey in my lifetime with fitness and body image. In my younger years, I struggled with self esteem issues because I thought I was too big. I was the little sister that was bigger than the big sister. This is something that has haunted me and caused many sleepless nights sitting up wondering what was wrong with me and why I was that way. When I moved to Virginia is really when I started to notice that the people here are active and that maybe I can be too so that I'm not a victim of complacency, but a champion of my own destiny.

 During my pregnancy, it was always my goal to ensure I was not overeating just because I was "eating for two" and to this day I still believe that pregnancy cravings are a myth because I didn't have any, lol. Any who, I dropped all of the baby weight and then some. I looked great, and then the unthinkable and unimaginable happened, I became too small (in the opinion of others). Never before had I heard from friends and family members questioning whether or not I eat at all. Continuous comments on how skinny I am and that I could stand to gain a few pounds caused those same self esteem issue to arise again. I couldn't believe it! This made me angry and hate myself because my clothes started to look weird and replacing an entire wardrobe is expensive.

 It took me a while to realize that I shouldn't actually care about what others have to say when it comes to me and my body. It is hard to not care when it is the ones closest to you who have these opinions though, but overall if I want to be small, or if I want to be big, it is my choice, and my life and I will live it how I see fit. I did some deep thinking about what I wanted from myself and how I wanted to look to make myself happy. I have determined that information and have set out to make it happen. So let this be a word to the wise, Eff your opinion of me and how I look. . . with all due respect :). I'm strength training to get my long lost butt back, lol, and to pick up just a few pounds of muscle for me, myself, and I. #ThatIsAll

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